Taylor's Dream
by adversary2113
Summary: Taylor dreams she's a princess holding a Royal Court. Oneshot.


A Real Life Princess or Taylor's Dream

Taylor Hagen was tired. She had taken down most of the "Chilloween " decorations just after the party, such as it was, had broken up. It had been a mixed bag of results. On the plus side, Jackson had actually done well on his singing, Lex, Eric and Mel had all came through on presents, as had Nathan. It was Daley who had seemed determined to cast a pall on the festivities as usual.

As she went to sleep an hour later, Taylor's mind wandered back to the palys she had been to the last summer, here she had done her first cello performance. The day's events mixed into her mind as ell as she left the island for her dreams.

( A huge set, strongly reminiscent of a second rate Robin Hood or King Arthur production. Taylor is sitting on the Royal Throne. It bears a suspicious resemblence to a toilet with a back and has a fuzzy pink seat on it. She is dressed in a full length pink strapless gown. Lex is standing beside her in a court page outfit with a scroll of names and crimes in his hands. Daley is there in a set of red robes. She is also hunchbacked.)

Taylor: Well, let's get the King's Court started for the day. Since Daddy, uh, His Majesty is having some dietary problems today.

Lex, sotto voice: " He's got the runs."

Taylor: "Call the first one in page boy."

Lex spoke out loudly: " The first summoned to the court is Farmer McHugh."

Taylor, looking puzzled as Nathan walks in , in medieval peasant clothes with a pitchfork in his hand and hay in his bushy hair. " Are you Farmer McHugh?"

Daley, in a whisper: " E eye e eye oh.

Nathan: " Yes, you Royal high and Mightyness." He smiled at her winningly.

Taylor: " Ooh, I like your manners. Ok, what's the prob Bob?

Nathan: " I caught a man molesting my livestock. He killed my pigs and my pet canary. He terrified my livestock. He scared them so bad, my cow gave sour milk and my ass is constipated."

Daley:" Did they have Maalox in the old days?" She zips it at a glare from Taylor.

Taylor: " Well, bring the accused in. "

Mel, dressed in an executor's outfit comes in, jabbing Eric, dressed in filthy rags with an axe.

Lex read the charges against him: " You are accused of pig killing, canary strangling , making the milk go bad and stopping McHugh's ass up. How do you plead?

Eric: " Usually on my knees."

Daley and Lex trade incredulous looks.

Taylor: " Get serious. How do you plead?"

Eric replies nervously; " Uh, can I plead the fifth?"

Daley spoke up" There's no Constitution in the Dark Ages."

Taylor interrupts angrily: " Quiet, Lady Know-It-All. Let the man answer to my ROYAL WISDOM." You could practically see it written in all caps.

Taylor begins a question and answer with Eric.

Taylor: ' So, why did you kill the pigs?'

Eric: " They were going to squeal."

Taylor : "Why did you kill the canary?"

Eric: " He was going to sing."

Taylor: "How did you make the cow give sour milk?"

Eric " I guess it saw me choking my chicken."

Daley and Lex trade a high five behind the throne.

Taylor, confused, ignoring them :" I don't remember chicken choking being included. Are their any witnesses to that?"

Mel breaks in: " The writing is on the dungeon wall."

Taylor: "' What is this about stopping McHugh's ass up?"

Eric: " He had gas so I put a cork in it."

Taylor to Lex:" Are there any character witnesses for him?"

Lex: " We have a letter from his village. "

Daley:" I bet they want their idiot back." She bumps knuckles with Lec again.

Taylor: " I know how to get to the truth. Get the Wiz in here."

Enter Jackson in a white robe with a hood made out of skinned rats. A tall, white hood on his head

Taylor:" Grand Wizard Jackson here will sort you out McHugh."

Nathan: " Give him hell."

Jackson whips a wand out. He does a slow burn as it visible wilts.

Taylor:" Aren't you a little young for that problem?"

Mel: " You're being mean to my I love so much."

Jackson's wand stiffens up , to the snickers of Lex and Daley.

Jackson points the wand at Eric and casts a spell: " Hair of toads, tongue of frogs, fur of cats, lips of hogs "

Taylor: " Quit making it up and zap him."

Jackson:" You ruin all my fun." He points the and at Eric and there's a bright flash.

Eric stands there drooling.

Lex: " I don't see the difference."

Taylor : " Zip it. Ok beast boy , guilty or innocent."

Eric: " Guilty".

Taylor: " Sick 'im hood rat."

Jackson:" Eye of newt, toad so warty, make this jerk smaller than Shorty." looking at Lex.

Lex; " I'm only ten!"

Eric is now the size of a rat. Jackson picks him up and shoves him into a pocket of his robe.

Jackson: " I'll feed him to the pigeons later."

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Taylor woke up smiling. She had the feeling she'd had a good dream, but she couldn't remember a bit of it.

Ok, it's not gonna win any awards. Just having to rest from the drama in my other stories.


End file.
